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Writing, child care and resistance

21/1/2002

Seaford

5.55 a.m Shattered but buzzing

Awake because TBT woke shouting ‘Stop it you’re’ giving me a headache’. This sounds like a nightmare. It also sounds like something I have said when I have been trying to concentrate or block something out while Darlingest or one of the kids has been trying to get through to me.

6.40 a.m. Going spare

I have gone twice into the bedroom with a torch to look for a folder of print outs titled ‘Writing 2002’ that contains, amongst other things the notes printed from ‘Journey to Work’ – the story had hope to spend an hour writing. It alludes me, not downstairs in the study, not in my bag. I recall taking it out of my bag so that I wouldn’t have to carry it around Pevensey on Saturday.

Have a mad idea for ‘Time Telescope’. Alfie uses it to alert ships that were wrecked in the past so saving countless lost lives.

The Bodleain Library

Also open my eighteen year old leaver-arch file on the Bodleain. I know this thing lost its way, but reading the questionnaires staggers me. I hadn’t realised I sent this thing around to the key departments. Suddenly I have another ‘live’ documentary. Put the Bodleian online gives you a Wellsian World Encyclopaedia, it is ‘The Contents of Many A person’s brain’ – a way into personalities and an opportunity to discuss the democratisation of learning and information against the elitism engendered in the past by places of scholarship such as Oxford.

So I’m not so bothered when I finally settle down to write and am disturbed within minutes by Zozo calling for someone to go to her.

I have over done It

I am too tired. As I copy and paste entries into a back up disc I somehow delete or overlay several hundred words I have just written on the machinations of yesterday evening.

Cryptic Reminders:

Drop TBT at nursery.

Take Zozo to the library. (Loo. Snacks. Timers).

Collect TBT.

Then what?

All a bit cryptic but ‘doing the Diaryland’ has been somewhat obsessive of late.

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