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Value judgments, CBT, BPD and blogging

As a child my late father labelled me as making too many ‘value judgments.’ It may have stuck. He was equally emphatic about the spelling of judgment, and the correct use of apostrophes.

This tendency to have an emotional response over the objective could compromise how I judge the work of others.

  • Being aware of this ought to help me to form opinions based on facts.
  • Having some understanding of child psychology I also know that labels stick.
  • ‘Money burns a hole in your pocket’
  • I was told (age six, or seven) and so I became this person … or I had confirmation of who I was.

All this I am trying to change.

Tangentially to all of this, eight months of Cognitive Behavioural Therapy that was first mooted in 2005, is gradually adjusting my thinking and responses. My habit is to speak first, then think later. The same applies to what I write, particularly in a blog, an environment in which I have written, as I please, when I please and how I please for a decade. CBT ought to be turning off the negative, making me less prone to lash out; so far, so good. Where I am conscious I still fail is the willingness to agree with everyone & say ‘yes’ to everything in order to please. Later I begin to regret the view I had taken or the decision I had taken. Too phrases I need to use often are, ‘let me give that some thought …’ or ‘that’s interesting, let me get back to you …’

I know that there are many kinds and forms of blog.

As ‘entities’ I wonder even if a ‘blog’ is a suitable term where this space has many different uses & expectations imposed on it. Online Journal, E.Text book, e.notes … or the term I used, even registering the domain name in 2000 ‘The Contents of my Brain’ or ‘TCMB.’ i.e. in goes everything, a decade ago with no readily available function to ‘expose’ all or to ‘share’ with a define audience or readership.

Where in lies the next issue. If a blog, like a log or a journal or a diary is written for and by one author then by its nature it is likely to be more honest if kept locked and private. As I know, a blog, like a diary, becomes a very different thing once it is published or in the case of the Internet, ‘out there.’ Think of Anais Nin and her Journals.

Blogs are not what they used to be.

In 1998 those who blogged might have been shipwrecked travellers on a small island – it didn’t take long to suss each other out. Some wrote for the sake of it, others had something to say … one or two were innovators, and creatives, HTML wizards who constantly played with the possible and what was then impossible.

Mummy has come along and made us put our toys away

Many would so this depth of ‘reflection’ is counter-productive. Others argued that a degree of ‘exposure’ is required in order to establish connectivity with like minds and the curious.

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